From time to time I am approached by someone that desires to "feel" better about their current situation. Often times, these are successful people in some aspect of their life, but still have a somewhat "hollow" or "empty" feeling.
Most often this feeling creates a sense of angst because they feel it shouldn't be there. After all, why would a successful and happy person with a great job and family ever feel this way?
Well, it isn't quite that simple. People are still people.
For whatever reason, a particular pattern emerges in many people that are busy.
- Over inflated feeling of importance on a particular task.
- Less delegation of work duties due to feeling that only you can do something right.
- More time spent at work and thinking about work.
- Feeling distracted when you are trying to relax or spending time with family.
- Becoming a poor listener, because you are distracted by your own problems.
- The perception of you by others becomes that of not caring or thinking you are better then someone else.
- You become slightly withdrawn and disconnected.
This cycle then begins to continue as you can't seem to get out of the funk.
How to get out of this cycle:
- Delegate specific job tasks: You may be responsible for the overall outcome of a project, but that doesn't mean each detail must be personally handled by you.
- Set up evaluation points: Depending on the length of a particular project, set aside time so that you and the the person / people working on each task can discuss how it is going.
- Improve listening skills: During the course of any conversation, listen to the other person. Instead of focusing on your next job duty or the next thing you want to say, simply listen to what the other person is saying. You "prove" your listening when your responses are in tune with the other person's questions or statements.
- Prioritize your life: While people have many interests at any given time, the time spent doing and thinking about them need to be clear in your mind. This is work, family, and recreation. When this prioritization gets out of whack, you know it internally because you are either disconnected at work, home, or in your hobbies. There is a balance.
What this improves:
- The people you interact with will enjoy their time spent with you. Nobody enjoys feeling like they are playing 2nd fiddle to your thoughts. When you are distracted....everyone knows it and they feel it. Doing this on occasion is normal, doing this all the time is annoying.
- You will see that you have more free time. Delegation of duties is true leadership. It empowers another person, it shows trust and confidence, and it will free up your time. If you feel you have to do everything because quality of work will suffer, then re-evaluating your employees may be in order.
- Quality of family time will greatly improve. Family time is not work time. Don't focus on work when with them. Remember, once time passes, you can't get it back. Not many people speak of wishing they spent more time working and less time with family when they are dying.
- Free flowing thoughts will once again emerge. When you allow yourself to be unburdened with unnecessary stress, your mind enjoys it. You will regain your creative thinking and get much better sleep.
- More time means more relaxation. Nobody can operate at a high level all the time. It is absolutely necessary to step back from time to time (regularly) and free yourself from everyday life. Do something you enjoy. Read, write, play golf, go to a movie, whatever it is, go and do it. Don't feel bad about it either. "Me" time is crucial for a more well balanced life.
Curt Fletcher aka The Likeability Guy, is a Real Estate Professional, Business Development Strategist, Published Author of the book, "How To Sell More Homes and Increase Your Income," Sales Trainer, and Professional Speaker that focuses on improving your Likeability to increase your Opportunities for Success!
