Are you the Star of your own movie?

Have you ever noticed that when people answer their cell phones in public, their voice suddenly raises several octaves?

Why do people feel the need to talk as though they are stuck in a wind tunnel and the only way to give the listener the most valuable of all information is to talk so loud as if their life depends on it?

This is something that has always confused me. It never fails, as soon as you walk into a store or a restaurant, someone will get a phone call and go from a normal inside talking voice to that of an obnoxious celebrity that needs to tell all their fans and paparazzi what is happening.

I think the public cell phone call makes the talker feel like they are starring in their own movie and all the people around them are just “extras” or “fans” getting a glimpse into your life.

Since you are the star of the movie, you have to “over” talk, make yourself sound WAY more important then you really are, or laugh louder than normal to entertain your audience.

It’s almost as if the cell phone gives people a feeling of importance and empowerment that otherwise doesn’t exist. The public phone call is your opportunity to “show off” your power, control, humor, stature, popularity, or any other role that is otherwise lacking in your normal daily life.

When the phone rings, your fifteen minutes of fame begins.

I’m going to burst your bubble just a little bit. It’s not fun to be an “extra” in someone else’s movie. It is actually really annoying and somewhat inconsiderate of others around you.

Now I have to admit, from time to time I have actually been entertained by the “I’m so important talker.” For some reason, I gain enjoyment from listening to people talk about how they are thinking about quitting their job and how their company will really miss their valuable input when they are gone, yada, yada, yada speak. Or my personal favorite is the “I’m gonna tell my boss off talker”.

This is always funny for me. I love the people that tell other people how they either told their boss off or that they are going to. I am willing to bet very few of those “telling your boss off” conversations ever really happen, so it always perks up my ears when I hear that kind of talk.

I realize that most of these conversations take place in more of a “blowing of steam” manner, but when they happen on the cell phone in public, they are always in the harsh factual power tone so their audience gets the impression they are a real force on their job. I think it is the ego boost that derives from other people hearing of your importance is the real reason for this kind of talk.

The thing about being the “loud cell phone talker guy” that impacts likeability is simple. You lose credibility when you talk “big” talk or you are obviously making yourself seem over important.

It really means that you may lack the internal confidence to not need this extra ego boost to always perform at a high level. Aside from that, you never know who is in your audience, perhaps it is someone that knows you or works with you. Maybe it is a manager at a company you would like to work for and you show up for an interview and they remember you as the annoying loud talker.

The best rule of thumb here is when your phone rings in a public setting, walk away from the majority of people and have your conversation somewhat privately. If you need to yell to have your listener hear you, get a new cell phone.

Likeability is the Key to Expanding your Sphere of Influence!

Which type of person are you?

The type that walks around with your eyes up when people pass you or the type that lowers your head and does not make eye contact when people walk by?

I used to be the type that would look away. Whether I was walking on the street, at school, or at work, I would always see people coming towards me and then dart my eyes away when it came time to pass them.

I have no idea why I would do that. As time has passed, I have completely changed my ways.

Now it's almost like a game to me. I can spot the "looker aways" from a mile away it seems. I like to make eye contact with them until right when they try to look away, and then I say that super scary word, "Hello!"

About twenty percent of the time I'll get a "hello" response back. About fifty percent of the time I get nothing more than an odd "I don't know you" look, and about thirty percent of the time I get nothing at all--not even an awkward half smile.

What is the deal?

Is it that people really don't like to talk to strangers? Perhaps people are so consumed in their own thoughts that they are not paying attention? Or is it simply that people are afraid to get out of their comfort zones to say hello to someone they don't know.

I believe it's simply the fear of the unknown. People fear meeting new people for the most part because it is not comfortable.

Life is funny. You never know who you are in the presence of. While you are waiting in line at a store, sitting at the airport, or simply just walking down the street, you have no idea who that "mystery" person is.

While Blogging on Activerain, a real estate networking blog site, I came across an intriguing article about your Sphere of Influence (SOI) written by Jennifer Allan.

We all have our own sphere of influence or people that we network with and are comfortable bouncing our thoughts off of. Think of how many people that you have the "potential" to interact with on a daily basis.

What better way to expand your SOI than meeting just a couple new people each day.

Have you ever had the thought, "I don't know anyone that does that?" By meeting new people each day by simply saying, "Hello," you can grow your SOI by leaps and bounds each week.

In one such instance for me, a professional speaker came to speak to the company that I was working for. Although, we regularly had people come to speak to us, this particular speaker struck a chord with me.

After a couple months, I decided I would like to thank him for his message and ask him a few questions. Little did I know, my simple little effort of contacting this guy would lead to such great rewards.

I really wanted to write a book that I knew could help people sell more homes, but didn't know where to start. After speaking with him, he not only encouraged me, he offered to help me at many stages of the publishing process.

After about a year, my first book was published, "How To Sell More Homes and Increase Your Income." I cannot think of a more self-less act than helping someone that you don't even really know.

This speaker's name is Bryan Dodge and he is an Excellent Professional speaker with a Great Message.

How big is your sphere of influence (SOI)?